It's why I didn't want to come along. He almost didn't want to come today, either. "But I also want you to hold onto it.". "What are you smiling at?" After a moment, he finally spoke. "Because you said you were okay, and I knew you weren't.". Akaashi could still feel the sensation of his wild white and black hair brushing against his cheek whenever he moved, and the warmth that came from him as he held him close. Bokuto would lay still for quite a while, his head tilted to the side with one hand on his stomach, and the other at his side. "What's this?" He wouldn't show this, but Kuroo's words had hit him harder than he could ever imagine. In a daze, Akaashi's last words were, "Good night, Koutarou," before he slipped off into a deep sleep. His eyes where set forward. The drastic weight loss was awful enough, but as if to add insult to injury, Bokuto's worsening condition also made it increasingly difficult for him to walk, move, and speak. a while back in the story when bokuto was still alive, he told akaashi that he hoped that in another life, he'd be able to find akaashi again so that they can be together forever, hence why he said "i found you" :((, So i think there r two possible meanings of the ending so. They felt mandatory now. "You don't have to put that." He watched as Bokuto's chest rose and fell with each breath that kept him alive. Hesitating for only a second, he reached his hand out and took the device into his hands. But he wasn't, then." I'm not sick, but this place makes me feel like I am." He had probably lost a bit overtwenty pounds in the two months that passed. He smoothed his thumb over Bokuto's knuckles. "Why did you stop so suddenly? by postingAO3stories. "That's Fine with me." He rubbed the back of his neck. Standing still, Akaashi remained in place for quite some time, his legs refusing to carry him further. ", Akaashi looked down. Work Search: Bokuto looked exhausted beyond belief, yet there he stood, excited to make his way to the gymnasium. "Goodbye.". ", "It passed." by hatsumix. I've got time. So then why was he so cheerful about his entire situation? And here he is". The condition can cause memory loss, delusions or depression. "Don't talk like you're not one". Akaashi pointed down the road. Several hours had passed since the message from Kuroo, and both Bokuto and Akaashi didn't do much. Shut him out, don't let him in. Bokuto stuck his head out of the window slightly and kept it there as the snowflakes fell all around him. Akaashi nodded once, and that was all that Bokuto needed to hear before he ran off to retrieve the ball. Akaashi stuffed the sheets into his bag. Outside, the sky above grew dark as clouds rolled in. Perplexed, Akaashi directed his full attention to Bokuto. "Awful." His eyes widened as much as they could. There was silence, and then there was a sound. "You can sit anywhere." Akaashi looked at his phone to read the sentence. His head hung low, and his attention belonged only to the handheld system that entertained him. He sat cross-legged, with a shirt on that was two sizes too big, and a hat that looked as if it had been placed on his head without his consent. After that night, things had only gone downhill from then. "Fatal Familial Insomnia? "You seem to have grown more attached to that Pocky stick than me". Akaashi watched him and zipped up his jacket. And even if he could speak, he wouldn't have been able to talk for long considering the state he was in. He managed a feeble shrug and turned to continue on with the movie that he'd watched for the thirtieth time already. All he had to do was talk to someone, and in an instant, they would be involved in Bokuto's lively shenanigans once again. and akaashi replies with "You found me." YES! Despite this, Bokuto was still close enough for their arms to touch. It was difficult, however, as each time he tried to drift off to sleep, that unnerving fear of having the same dream would jerk him back awake. He looked at Akaashi with heavy lidded eyes. He blinked weakly and slid his fingers down the sides of his phone, a sign of weariness that he could not disobey. He zipped his jacket up to shield himself from the harsh winds that came his way and advanced forward. "Would you like for him to send a photo?". Akaashi couldn't sleep, but it wasn't because of his unfamiliarity with Bokuto that caused this. "So How are you taking all of this, if I may ask? I've realized that I don't want to come here anymore. It was the last word Kuroo murmured before he stared forward as well, having nothing more to say. Bokuto looked back up and thought for a moment, then nodded. "He's a bit more of An ass, to say the least." After this, he would repeat the same process, paying little to no mind to the freezing cold that surrounded him. I had no power over it whatsoever. You never miss a day Don't your parents ever ask why you come here so much? Though the question was asked clearly, Bokuto didn't make a sound, nor did he move. Akaashi leaned back in his seat. "So we were going to step outside for a minute or two in order to get this owl to shut up.". Akaashi watched Bokuto, listening to every word he said. "Relax." "No is my final answer." It works for me as well. You had a nightmare? He's going to be fine. ", "It's not." If there was one thing that Akaashi had learned about Bokuto in the little time that he'd known him, it was that he wasn't too fond of staying locked up indoors. I thought you fell asleep.]. He feared he wouldn't be able to pull himself out of this state, but then it occurred to him that he was not alone in this. You like volleyball too?! Akaashi relaxed himself against his mattress and closed his eyes, a powerless yawn leaving him. Sleeping didn't come as easy as it used to. "That weather will only hurt you. Akaashi looked up from his phone after sending the message and turned his head to notice that Bokuto was once again staring at him with acute interest. "We're going back to the hospital right now. Bokuto stared down at the white clump of melting ice, and with one finger, he pressed against it to watch it fall apart. Akaashi grew silent and knitted his fingers together on his stomach, his head relaxing into his pillow. He understood where Akaashi was coming from and didn't even think of holding his icy tone against him. He didn't care, nor did he think he would care in the near future. I don't want to read them. "I'm fine. A stronger laugh broke out from him, rattling his body as he lay down in bed. He then stared at Akaashi, waiting for his response. Sunlight broke into the room, cascading all along the walls and floor, and casting shadows all around. I haven't gone outside in days." Akaashi would answer his questions coldly, with little to no emotion, but Bokuto would cherish these answers and retort with excitement in his tone. He lay on his back, with his head on some of Akaashi's pillows. I've just got something to take care of, but I'll be sure to visit you tomorrow.". "Ah. You sleep if you want to. He breathed in that familiar scent that he'd grown so attached to, then exhaled quietly against Bokuto's prominent collar bone. I don't want to hear them. He leaned back in his chair. "Ah, I've finally said something funny." Kuroo looked at Akaashi sideways. He suffered no nightmares, nor did he see anything remotely close to a dream. Kuroo? Maybe taking him outside for a while would do him some good. Bokuto's words haunted him, and they repeated themselves over and over in his mind. It was the only normal thing to do, considering how he was the one who was suffering from said disease. He almost didn't want to ask the question. He pulled and tugged at them restlessly. externally i'm smiling probably because i'm trying to hide all those FEELS. But no matter how much he worried for him, Akaashi continued on their way to the window at a slow and steady pace until they finally made it. After a moment of trying to gather himself, Bokuto choked out two simple words with quivering lips. He avoided looking at Bokuto altogether. "What's up, guys? Akaashi frowned and felt that familiar pain pierce his chest. Why the hell did this have to happen to him? "If you would please listen." His company did not seem like the type to socialize so openly, so he figured simple inquiries would do just fine, especially if he kept them to a minimum. Akaashi sighed and lazily dragged his finger along the d-pad. "I feel the same about this place, honestly." He just breathed now. Bokuto had nothing more to say after that. He wasn't too sure why. He pressed pause on his PSP and tapped one end of it against his open palm. what disease did, bokuto have in another life. He turned his head and met Akaashi's gaze with weary, well rested eyes. Dissociative identity disorder (DID) is a mental health condition. He expected to hear a whine of resistance from him, but instead received nothing. "It's your house. In minutes, the information desk was in his sights, and for the first time in forever, he'd actually gone to it. It had been two months since Bokuto's visit over his home, and ever since then, Akaashi found that making his way to the hospital had become a daily routine for him. ", Shrugging one shoulder, Akaashi grabbed his phone. My sister told me to read it, since I really don't cry. Bokuto looked down and twisted his lips to the side. It was then that he started to inaccurately press at words that he was trying to make out. DEFINITELY. Akaashi squeezed his hands together to keep them from shaking uncontrollably. Why must I always run into the strange ones? "I don't like to see him like that, either. "What doesn't?" Akaashi opened the first movie that he had in his computer's memory. He swallowed once, hoping to get rid of the lump in his throat. His hand held onto one of Bokuto's very thin arms, and his thumb would occasionally rub up and down to comfort him. His breathing was controlled, much like one of a person's who was actually asleep. It was a quiet laugh. He said the name with a lack of interest to try and soften the blow, but Akaashi knew that no matter how he approached it, Bokuto would frown when he heard the name. "It's just A slow, downhill ride f-from here. 1) the most possible explanation - it was a dream, and it was all in Akaashi's head. But most of the time, he only sat there and continued to watch nothing. The hospital AU that no body asked for, but that I took upon myself to write. His face looked both shocked and exhausted at the same time. And I d-don't want you to See it all h-happen.". He watched Bokuto intently, curious to know what his answer would be. "I'm Holding it now.". Slowly, Akaashi's laugh eased into a chuckle, and as he sat there in his seat, he looked down at Bokuto with placid eyes. "Were you ever friends with Bokuto?" "Fucking bullshit." (31) 3351-3382 | 3351-3272 | 3351-3141 | 3351-3371. puppies for sale in nc under 200 associe-se. It's another reason why I didn't want to pay Bokuto any visits." "Don't record me.". His hand trembled harder with each passing second, as if the movement would cause Bokuto to wake up. Pulling his laptop close, Akaashi smoothed his finger along the mouse pad. I was in tears for most of the hours it took me to read it, and when I finished, I legitimately sobbed so hard I woke up sick the next morning. An old friend." After what felt like the longest ten seconds of his life, a sudden shudder charged down Akaashi's spine, causing goose bumps to rise on his flesh. Akaashi kicked his legs out of bed and strode to his window. The black haired male looked up from his hands. Get help and learn more about the design. Akaashi closed his eyes and heaved out a sigh, feeling more and more hopeless with each passing second. Exhaling heavily, Akaashi turned to look at the desk near his bed. Whenever we did, Kuroo and Bokuto would meet up afterwards and spend time together. We can watch Cloud Atlas again. ", "Not to my knowledge. He threw the ball to Akaashi. Akaashi's face buried into the crook of his neck. He was the only person who could get him through those horrible moments, after all. "I told you I had my moments every so often.". He could still remember the small details, like how Bokuto's starry shirt would slip off his shoulder every so often when he stirred in bed, and how the feel of Bokuto's weight on him would take his breath away. He pulled out a phone, and to Akaashi's dread, he asked for his phone number. With his hand clinging to his neck, he slowly looked up to find that Akaashi was staring back at him with vacant eyes, void of all known emotion. But he couldn't keep it up forever. "See, look." But even if he has, that's not what I meant." He turned his head to get a clear look at Bokuto's face, but instantly wished he hadn't. It was one of those "White days", as Bokuto liked to call them, so he paid much more attention to the world beyond the glass than he did to his own confined life in the hospital. "How are you feeling, Koutarou?". Imagine their faces when they notice I'm not even in my room." "Come." ok look. Akaashi drew in a breath, but found that he couldn't say anything. I was so weak, and it'd gotten to the point where I could barely breath. He pulled a mock cool expression, but this was cut short as someone else spoke up. It was a surreal feeling, one that he could never in one million years describe. ], [No, more like the clichd kind, where you sit up in bed in a cold sweat. He smiled down at him. At times, Bokuto would do nothing but lie there in bed, twitching back awake whenever his body tried so desperately to fall into the sleeping state that it once knew. But people never laugh at my jokes. Akaashi furrowed his brow and looked outside, away from Bokuto. His eyes stared forward, uninterested in the information desk several meters from him. He would have laughed if he could. He stared at Bokuto and could only nod with whatever it was he thought he was agreeing with. Akaashi pulled a solemn face and closed the laptop. Bokuto kept his finger up, then moved his hand to point it at himself. Bokuto beamed at him with a smile that spoke a thousand words, and his hand reached out to touch Akaashi's cheek. 'All I can say is that sleeping doesn't come as easily as it used to.'. His breathing was heavy, his heart rate quicker than usual; Akaashi could feel his heart pounding in his throat, making it difficult to swallow. "My parents are out for a month," he'd unconsciously said, causing Bokuto to go into a begging frenzy to stay over until Akaashi said yes. Stretching out a trembling arm, Akaashi took hold of Bokuto's hand. Bokuto tucked his hands into the pockets of his hood, his shoulders hunching. Unless Bokuto was purposely playing the fool. Akaashi twisted his lips to the side and decided to bring up something else. That he wasn't another one of those illusions his mind would create. Akaashi lifted himself onto his elbows. After several seconds, he'd returned to see that Bokuto had changed his position in bed entirely. The last thing he wanted to do was wake him up, so they lay in silence for minutes on end. He couldn't face him. He was undone. ", Bokuto couldn't help but guffaw, his head tilting back. Akaashi did not give him time to react to this as he moved closer still, and when he was close enough, he lowered his head to lean it on Bokuto's shoulder. Akaashi shifted to the side to give his visitor more room. Very happy to have met you. That had been the fifth time that month where Akaashi had to tear himself out of another nightmare. He didn't bother to check. He was trying to tell Akaashi something else. He wanted nothing more than to push him away, throw away the forms, and never set foot into that hospital again, but for some strange and irritating reason, Akaashi found it difficult to deny Bokuto. His hands at his sides, Bokuto bowed. Kuroo's the heavier one. Akaashi leaned over in his seat to move himself closer to Bokuto. Akaashi could feel Bokuto's enthusiasm through his text messages. ", "It's fine. Akaashi leaned his head on his hand, chin resting in his palm. He pushed Akaashi back this time. He wore a grimace upon his reddened face. He looked up, and his gaze found Bokuto's. Hang in there, alright? His hands twitched once, and he moved closer, leaning into Bokuto's touch. It wasn't necessarily a bow. ", "I am. It hurt him to think that Bokuto had barely even experienced the joys of a young adult's life before that crippling disease had taken a hold of him. And even if he didn't show up, he would still spend his days sending messages to Bokuto, be it text, email, or the occasional video chat. Bokuto's skin crawled, goose bumps pimpling his porcelain surface. He felt him move against his head in response, so he continued. The smile on Bokuto's lips grew just a little more, signifying that he'd answered yes to Akaashi's question. "You were out for about an hour.". Akaashi stirred in bed slightly and let out a weak grunt. "I know." Weakly, Akaashi parted his lips. And so he continued to try and grasp sleep, expecting nothing from the noise. "It was sudden." Relaxing his head against the crook of Bokuto's neck, Akaashi blinked wearily and stared off into the distance. " Is that why you came here? What was he to do? ", Bokuto snorted. He exerted more force into his arms, getting Bokuto to take a step back. He reached a hand out and found Bokuto's. He translated all that his words could not. He held an air around him as if he were having a normal conversation about the weather. "Of course I don't. I know I don't have much time left." "Yeah, I'm-," He turned his head, "Is there someone in there?" "Koutarou Why do you watch me like that?" His voice was full of excitement as he proceeded to enter the name for his new contact. His hands quivered as he dug his nails into his knuckles. Here too" His voice was weaker than before, if possible. Looking up from the laptop screen, Bokuto directed his attention to Akaashi. Sometimes when I blink you aren't there anymore" Bokuto rubbed one of his eyes, then the other, and let his hand drop to his sides. Akaashi closed his eyes and sighed, swaying absentmindedly in his step, opening his eyes just in time to swiftly avoid colliding with someone. I'll see you soon.]. "Okay." He spoke with a small woman there, and after several minutes had passed, Akaashi backed away from the desk, some sheets of paper in hand. "They Aren't really there, are they?" In another life.". Kuroo bid Bokuto farewell for the time being, while Kenma made his way downstairs to exit the building. That night was no different as Akaashi repeated this action for the twentieth time that day, his thumb scrolling up and down for minutes on end until he finally came to a stop. He must have been. "That was your idea of a joke?". Then I'll have to walk you to the hospital before the doctors find out you're missing and lose their minds. The page loaded. He motioned for Bokuto to come closer. They don't pay much attention to me anyways!". "Drowning in something black, sort of like tar. "I see." He'd brought along a volleyball of his own, just in case they weren't provided with any. Akaashi watched as one of Bokuto's hands twitched involuntarily, and to his dismay, it wouldn't stop. Because of the nightmare? He couldn't bring himself to read over the last four words of the text again and ultimately shut off his phone. It's ridiculous.". "Didn't think you knew that about him. In Another Life LittleLuxray 4.68 768 ratings185 reviews Sleeping didn't come as easy as it used to. Bokuto looked down at Akaashi's hand. Hesitantly, Akaashi barely managed to wave back before he heard his name being called from that all too familiar room, by that all too familiar voice. The air around Akaashi thickened, and suddenly he found it difficult to breathe. Mildly embarrassed, Bokuto looked away and rubbed his arms. He had so many things he'd wanted to do with him, so many things he'd wanted to say, but all of those things seemed to have fallen away once the moment had finally come. Just sleep, it'll pass away [Chorus] In another life I'll be well for you So we can stay up and watch our favorite movie until two In another life I'll chase after you Just like hide and. He sat at home in bed, with a snug fitting shirt on and his hair an absolute mess. Pointing a finger down the hall, a small assistant nurse directed Akaashi to a different desk, one where he would be able to find more information on the subject. Akaashi took a glance out the window, only to instantly throw on his clothes and toss his bag over his shoulders. I was actually thinking of taking my leave soon, as well-", "What? "Things happen.". Sho, known as Shawn in the US dub, is the male lead of The Secret World of Arrietty. He knit his fingers together and kept his eyes down, anticipating when the first boom of thunder would sound. ", "Kenma is fine." Nodding once, Akaashi acknowledged Kuroo's words, but did not know how to respond to them. "Hey- hey!" He breathed in sharply. Akaashi entered the building and greeted the woman at the front desk, as always. On the first night out of the three, Akaashi flat out refused to get any rest in fear of suffering another night terror. "All I can say is that sleeping doesn't come as easily as it used to." It would hurt if he did. Bokuto didn't respond. Kuroo." He eyed the blonde one for quite a while. Kuroo asked with a hushed tone. In his silence, Bokuto wept to himself, fat tears rolling down his cheeks in numbers. "I didn't Want you to leave. You don't need to know a THING about Haikyuu!! Are you busy?". "Yeah. They didn't speak for a moment, and the room was filled with the hushed sounds of the outside. He chuckles. Long time.". See you, Bokuto. Looking away slowly, Akaashi watched as Bokuto and Kuroo reappeared in the distance. "I could ask you the same thing" Akaashi's lips screwed to the side. But during the other two nights, he surely did make the effort to try and lull himself to sleep, but each time he did, he either found himself stirring awake from a strange dream, or lying wide awake in the middle of the night, half expecting to receive a message from Bokuto. Not only was Bokuto the kind of guy to sneak out when no one was watching, but his condition had quickly begun to worsen without warning. 61.7K 2.6K 3.9K. "I am. It was a dreary place for him, a place he was not fond of, but a place he was obligated to visit. ", "His entire body was relaxed. His hand wobbled so much that it was impossible to decipher which letters he was hitting. They both found it easier to believe in that lie than to accept the truth of what was to come. RandyKrauswasparalyzed.Hisleftsidewasuseless.Buthisrighthandwas1enoughtoliftabuckettohisforehead.Oncehe'dbeenapoliceofficerandownedaprivate-eyeagency.Oncehe . He held it up to his ear and waited for the other line to pick up. Strange. ", "So I can't sleep." (Not my story all credits goes to LittleLuxray on ao3) It seemed more along the lines of an act of affection, or at least as affectionate as Kenma could get, which wasn't much. He could feel Bokuto's chin rubbing against the top of his head, like it always did. I loved this. "How many words are there? "Yeah, but for all the wrong reasons." "And that's Kenma for you" Kuroo groaned as he repositioned himself in bed, and then he smiled. He removed his slippers and waited at the entrance for his friend to enter. "Alright" He closed his eyes. "But" Akaashi shocked himself with that one word. btw, HERES THE DISCORD SERVER!! His voice a mere murmur, Akaashi moved closer to Bokuto, then resumed to lie down on his back, his head slightly elevated with the pillows that sat behind him. He thought back to the bags around Bokuto's eyes. He could smell his faint scent. He was redirecting the pain. He swore without a filter. He'd never received a faster response in his life. what disease did, bokuto have in another life. Mentally, he was more than ready to spike, but not so much physically. texas rule of civil procedure 99. largest staffing companies in the us 2021; moorabool news editor; romaji practice sentences; menards swing set accessories; what city produces the most nfl players; Why do I let him do this? He kicked his legs out of bed and walked across his room to retrieve a thick blanket that sat bundled up in a rolling chair. His yellow eyes stared at the screen intently. "Don't cry over it." But then he spoke up again. Akaashi turned away and frowned. Did you just Say that to yourself?". "Ha! His green eyes then fell to study his paling skin; his veins were easily noticeable now, and they bulged from beneath his flesh whenever he moved. It was all still there, but there was something different about it all that puzzled Akaashi. That would be nice. They are my favorite ship in Haikyuu, so typing this makes little to no sense to me. I never meant to drag you into my life". I couldn't put Bokuto through all of that. No one was bothered by him, so there he stood. "You've had two panic attacks this week already, and your hallucinations are getting worse. He intended on closing his eyes and falling asleep for real afterwards, but after having felt his mattress shake for the fourth time, he opened his eyes. I can still walk around and get to where I have to go! Akaashi is a former intern in this hospital, and he loaths it. "You don't like to see him like that, do you?". "Keep him company from now on. Akaashi didn't want to bring up the fact that Bokuto probably would no longer possess the ability to walk by the time any snow did get a chance to fall, so he kept his mouth shut. You don't have to say it now if you don't want to.". He smiled in Akaashi's direction, bright yellow eyes catching his own. No words were exchanged for what seemed like forever before Akaashi spoke up. "So I figured if you left now You Wouldn't have to And it wouldn't h-hurt so much". Akaashi literally found nothing special about Bokuto. masked singer uk season 1 reveals . Bokuto turned his head, the pillow crumpling under his neck. It was small and measly, but there. Bokuto breathed in deeply, the sound filling the small space around them. I wish I could sleep like that again.". He observed his surroundings once again, having been fascinated by the inside of someone else's home. left kudos on this work. He looked up, gazed at Akaashi past his bleached blonde bangs, and straightened his back in the slightest way possible. Yeah, he left the room. Akaashi shifted, leaning in the direction of where he'd come from. The movie was well over two hours in, nearing its end, and Bokuto lay on his side, curled up and clutching the blanket with what little strength he had left. "I'd dream that I messed up during a spike, and then I'd wake up fuming, and would constantly tell myself that I was the best.". Bokuto knew this, and now Akaashi did, too. He knew that once they found out, they would take Bokuto away from him. Despite him being the one who asked, Bokuto held onto it tightly. I would like that. never reading fanfics again (probably will), *gestures vaguely* idk what to do with my life anymore i won't ever recover from this , I've cried so much, I really loved it, it had been a while since I don't cry with a book. Been here for about Four weeks now." I can.. B-arely speak. No one could hear me. He then reached out and took hold of Bokuto's arm to help him back to the bed. I've watched this movie so many times, I actually fell asleep." Akaashi sat in bed and wrapped a sheet around himself. Akaashi squirmed in discomfort. Other than those things, Bokuto found it nearly impossible to stomach anything else. Why had the sickly one taken a sudden liking to him? Akaashi went straight into the reading. "I spoke to Kuroo most of the time, so it doesn't count.". They shared each other's company in silence for what felt like the length of five minutes, and in that time, Akaashi never once looked to the side to catch a glimpse at Kuroo. 'Sleep well, Akaashi.' "Alright." speckle park bull sales 2021 847-461-9794; what disease did, bokuto have in another life. It had been sent two hours ago. this broke my heart into tiny little pieces, I really don't know if I will ever be able to recover. "Yes." Akaashi frowned. [Verse 2 . He couldn't look at his face. Playing off of this, Akaashi texted for Kuroo to send an image of himself for Bokuto to see. "I come to visit and I'm barely paid attention to, but when he comes along, he's given the whole package? "Shut up." He hated how difficult it had become for him to tell apart the real things from the fake ones. Getting into the groove, Akaashi follows his routine of preparing for school. "I don't Want you to Watch me decay. I read 5 sad hq ff cz I'm a broken idiot and the galaxy is endless and in another life hurt me on such a deep level. Akaashi woke up to the feeling of sunlight against his face. "Watch it." He could practically hear the frown in his voice. Akaashi let out a half-assed grunt and continued to stare forward. It would cause less spasms to grip Bokuto's body, allowing him to unwind more than he usually could. He flinched and pulled his hand away to stare at the screen. Akaashi wanted to scream, but he couldn't find his voice. Staring down wide-eyed at the floor of the hospital room, Bokuto fought to find words. "I said come." Are you feeling better?]. His eyes were half-lidded and glued to the screen, his face void of emotion.